The first tribunal was with the chickens.“According to our records,” the chief justice rooster announced in a loud, screeching voice, assuring he would be heard all the way back to the very last row of the cavernous courtroom, packed with clucking hens and muttering roosters of all kinds and colors.
“According to our records, during your lifetime, you have eaten," he paused with grave solemnity, "the equivalent of 8,693 chickens,” he declared, pointing his beak menacingly at me, his wattles inflated with indignation.
I shivered at the totality of it all.
“The accused shall stand before this court.”
I stood.
“Do you wish to make a statement before sentence is passed?”
“Yes,” I barely answered in tremulous voice.
“Proceed.”
Summoning up my courage, knowing there was little I could say that would alter my fate, I cleared my throat, took a deep breath, and at the top of my voice cried out:
“Cock-A-Doodle-Doo!”
~ by Russ Allison Loar
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